Five Little Piigs

The financial community has been giving us this bullshit about the Five Little Piigs countries for years. However, they have never attempted, to my knowledge, an analysis of what these five countries supposedly have in common. Precious little, imho. Let’s take a closer look.

Portugal
Portugal is well-known for having been for a long time running the European country with the highest number of PhDs in government. It ranks decently in terms of corruption and very well in terms of freedom of the press — higher than France and the UK, and just behind Germany. Portugal is not a very rich country, but they never tried to make things up. They had some luck in the ’90s with companies relocating there, only to be undercut by places in Eastern Europe like Slovakia. I hope they will be able to cash in on Brazil’s new status as an economic powerhouse. I wish them well, and hate those who scorn them.

Ireland
The so-called Emerald Tiger got rich by cheating other countries by telling companies to move their European Headquarters over there and not pay corporate taxes in any EU country. The boom led to an increase in real estate prices, and then the bust left them a bit bruised. But Ireland is a nation of only 4 million people, and they are — I do give them credit for this — quick to adapt. Plus, they’re as blue-eyed as the people who started this bullshit about the so-called PIIGS countries, so they have been officially taken off the list.

Italy
Oh, Italy! Let’s put it this way: in spite of all the negative things one can say about Italy — and there’s a lot to say, like corruption levels at Greek, Romanian or Bulgarian levels, and freedom of the press on par with Turkey — Italy is still the second largest manufacturing country in the EU and the second largest exporter after Germany. Northern Italy is very rich by any possible standard, and Italy as a whole has been a net contributor to the European Union for decades. The problem with Italy? It’s in no way a “democracy” and it’s run by thugs and thieves, i.e. “politicians” often with deep ties to organised crime.

Greece
Greece cooked their books and cheated on every other European country. This is bad. A decade ago, I read a report that said that Greece’s per capita GDP was then 85% of Italy’s. I couldn’t believe my eyes. But what about the people who were supposed to check on this bullshit: did they really believe that Greece had become a rich country? Why did France and Germany not check the numbers coming out of Athens before giving them the green light to join the Euro? And what right do they have now to screw the Greek people just to save their dumb banks who have “invested” so heavily is such a poorly-run economy?

Spain
Spain did a lot of things right in the quarter of a century after joining the European Union. And then probably put on a big head. Also, the balance of power moved away from those who were doing things right to people in Madrid who were more keen on self-aggrandising projects, like Europe’s largest network of high-speed railways, centered on Madrid and still lacking a connection along the Mediterranean corridor between Alacant and Barcelona. But let’s stick to the facts: before the burbuja burst, real estate was 13% of Spain’s GDP. In rich countries, it’s usually 6 to 7%. On November 9, Catalonia will vote for independence from Spain. I wish them the best of luck in building the Nou Pais they want so badly.